Susan Rambles: The Possible Risk of Living in Bliss
Now that it's actually working.
Ramble -
His name is Ocean Vuong and he is being interviewed about his writing, his mother, his history, his views on creating. I am so touched by this. The realness and the painful beauty of his words bring my tears. And then I’m having a hard time breathing. But that’s not exactly it. I’m gasping, yes. But I’m getting plenty of air flow. It’s as if I’m drowning in gladness. God, I know that sounds idiotic. But I don’t know how else to describe it.
For years I’ve danced with depression, numbness, and even thoughts of suicide. I have worked so damned hard to heal my trauma wounds. I hardly know what to do with myself now that it’s actually working. My healing process or what I like to call, “My slow bloody crawl over the decades,” now seems to be snowballing. In part because of the tremendous energies on our planet that are fast tracking everything, including healing. And in part because… I don’t know why the fuck it’s happening so big right now. I’m just thrilled that it is. I only kept up with my spiritual practice and healing work because my intuition would show me each next tenuous step. I had no evidence that I could point to to indicate that this was ever a good idea. Other than to say that it felt right down to my very bones. And trust me, many people did not agree with the decisions I made along the way.
That state of being happy and whole is happening to me more often now. The best way I can describe it is to say that I am feeling. And it’s not just the richness of emotions. The sight of colors are more vivid and alive. The sounds I hear are sweeter and seem to carry messages of hope. I had no idea how numbed out I was to life until I started to feel. I had no idea at all.
But sometimes this new way of being is almost overwhelming to me. Like a wave of explosive happiness rolling over me. (Hence the breakdown due to Ocean’s soulful words.) I am gobsmacked by the sheer beauty of it all. Those moments when I realize that I am alive and at peace with myself. The feeling like my lungs are filling with excitement is not that uncommon these days. I just keep smiling and take slow, deep breaths.
Believe it or not, I am now praying for help and guidance on how to handle it all. Can one explode from too much joy? I’ll have to let you know. I definitely don’t want to stop, or even slow this process. I’m up for the possible risk of living in bliss.
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If you would like to book a phone or an in-office session (in Boise, Idaho) with Susan for a psychic reading, energy healing, or mentorship sessions to strategize goal achievement and Soul Purpose discovery - Contact her at 208-260-0033 or IntuitiveExplorationswithSusan@gmail.com.
Susan Fullmer is a writer, conscious channel, shamanic practitioner, psychic medium, energy healer, energy reader, teacher, mentor, group facilitator, nurse, and licensed massage therapist. Susan specializes in extraterrestrial connections, and she is a telepathic talker. She has been in private practice since 1990 with her business, Intuitive Explorations with Susan Fullmer.
She draws from decades of study and practice in the healing arts including 35 years of nursing (both medical and mental health) and massage therapy (with extensive study in energy medicine). Susan has a plethora of experience in group facilitation, public speaking, mentorship, and teaching classes and workshops. In 2019 she graduated from Boise State University with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Multidisciplinary Studies with certificates in Leadership and Human Relations, and Dispute Resolution.
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I really loved this piece, friend. One of my favorites for sure. Love the honesty and the humility. 🙏🏼